Sort of an apology blog, an Ablogogy

I started off this year with a goal set to put up a blog once a week. To that end, i have failed miserably. At present i have five drafts in various states of completeness and can't find the words to finish any of them. I guess that's the way it goes at times, but it doesn't assuage my own disappointment. Ya see, this whole thing started with over ten inches of snow and ended up with Kolaches. So, i will try to sum up the whole break into one posting so i can delete all of those drafts. Who knows, i might even make myself giggle along the way.





Draft #1 It Snowed a Really Lot


It snowed. It snowed a really lot for here. It was beautiful.


Snow fall: Ten Hours, Picturesque Winterland: Seven Hours, Sunny and Warm Afternoon: TEXAS!!!!! Heck, that's really not all that cool. Once i saw a rainbow and a dustdevil while playing in the rain under a bright sunny sky. Now i'd like to see you top that one. It's funny though, some people wonder how some Texans pick up the habit of wearing a jacket with shorts. Really?? It seems normal enough to me, but then again i'm crazy so don't take my word for anything.


Draft #2 Finally an Artful Commercial

I loathe the way business panders to the consumer. I know this may not make any sense, but there has to be a way to convince people to buy your product without something like the Buger King. The Burger King is Kreepy or Kreepisimo or even the mostest Kreepiestest ad prop i've seen in my life. Every time i see "It" i want to pick up a ball bat, hunt it down, and kill "It" for the sake of the human genome. It would make me quite happy if i found out that "It" won a Darwin. But on to other things. The DQ chimp riding the dog herding chickens was cute and the Chick-Fil-A cows are pretty cool and the talking butter tub was alright, but you just don't see a lot of art in modern commercials. I believe it was Honda that had one a few years ago where a car put itself together from a stack of parts that was pretty nice, but i hate the ones with kids acting like parents or worse. Now, take the lowly Saltine Cracker. What the hell could you do to sell that?? Make a commercial with splashing soup in vibrant colors set to the tune "Rock You Like A Hurricane". It's beautiful. It is to me anyway. I looked for a youtube link, but maybe i'm the only one that thinks it's so great.

Draft #3 The Desert or The Lake

Typically we spend Spring Break at Canyon lake or in Alpine, that's the desert. Most often, the guys and I will go and spend the week doing knuckle-headed guy things and Donna will join us for the weekend at the end unless she arranges to get the Thursday or Friday off too. To begin with, this year was no different. Before making a decision on which route to take i knocked-up a friend to see if she was going to be in the desert that week. (Get your minds back where they belong, knocking up is a British expression for giving a ring, or a buzz, or a call, an email, some sort of making contact, and it is in this regard to which i speak) She said she would be there the latter half of the week. So, i made a plan to leave on Sunday for West, Texas, not to be confused with West Texas, to get some Kolaches and then on to the tail-race of Canyon Lake for some camping and fishing. Follow that with a days long drive to Alpine and a couple of nights there. Then we'd come home to be here in time to rest up and get ready for my Army Buddy to visit on Saturday. Well... Someone far more famouser than i once said, "If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans".
On Saturday, the night before we were to leave, my beloved Trooper you see pictured above developed an oil leak that prevented us from going anywhere until i could get my mechanic friend to look at it. Okay, Plan B: Make it up as you go along. Welcome to Spring Break '10


Draft #4 I Just Suck at Laundry???


Since i had nothing better to do over Spring Break, i did laundry. (insert giggle here) As though laundry only comes around at Spring Break or something. Though it did afford me the opportunity to address a growing concern i've had about my big kids socks. As you can clearly see from the picture on the left, there is a problem with his socks. I always ask if anyone needs anything from town and generally i am answered with "no". I guess it's a good thing he didn't need anything from town, you know, like a pair of shoes or something. The funny part of this is, i wondered just how old the nasty damn socks were and as it turns out, those are the ones he got for Christmas. Christmas!?! What?? Three months?? Ack!!! Suffice it to say, new shoes, new socks, timer reset for the next round which should be June?? Give me strength.


Draft #5 To West or Not To West...
Okay, since Spring Break was a bust, i had to try and capture some element of it just so i didn't feel so bummed out. Enter that quaint little Czech pastry, the Kolache.
Just south of here, about thirty miles north of Waco on IH35 is the town of West, Texas. It's one of those blink and you'll miss it kind of towns, but at the same time you drive through it the kids are saying why is Koh-Latch and Bakery on all the buildings. Kolaches are typically made with dried fruits or poppy seeds. Oh, the poppy seed ones are the best. So, in an attempt to capture something of the trip that never happened, i made Kolaches. Yes, those pictured are mine. No, you can't have any they are all gone. Like i tell my local friends, if you want some fresh bread, you have to get here before my older son (the one throwing Shot Put above) gets home. I don't call him Bucket-face for nothing. And before you ask, they were Poppy Seed, Apricot, and Prune. Hey! don't snub the prune. You might even say it's a true multi-tasker and quite tasty too.
I hope you got a giggle or two, until then, y'all take care of each other. D
P.S. Next time i'll tell you why i'll never miss milk again!!!!!!!