Krail destruction began as planned in 2012

For a very long time i have been collecting and nurturing barriers in my life. This isn't anything different than what we all do in some form or another, but in my case, I've been reluctant to clear any of them away. In recent years it has become apparent that i have accumulated enough of them that my life has entered a de facto pause. Hence causing my life to become tacit and i am anything but that. So, as is not my usual custom, i resolved to rid myself of as many of those things holding me back physically and emotionally as i am able to in good conscience.

For the last week i have been kicking elephants out of the living room like a mad man. Some of them were no brainers. Simple things I'd been stepping over for years. Yet others have been emotionally draining because i don't remember what life was like before they were erected and even now it's hard to envision what life will be like without them. I have a few left to clean out but the major ones have been dealt with and if i could take care of those, what's left shouldn't be a problem.

Last year i wrote about 18 entry's. That averages out to one every twenty three days. If i am barely scratching out those few lines, can i still claim to be a writer?? At present, i have five novels and a kitchen guide in various stages of completion. Unfortunately, they are in the same state of completion they have been in for the last decade. I haven't published in twelve years. I have lost my voice and my passion for those things i love and a years worth of reflection as to the why on the current state of affairs has led to this rampant clean-up. I'm mad. I'm sad. I let this happen and I'm the only one that is going to be able to reclaim my mission in life. It hurts. It's sad. I have talked to the principles involved in this and have come to a consensus on things. It doesn't make it easier, but it is no longer hidden away. It is out there and it is the way it has to be.

I am undoubtedly going to be doing some things this year that may seem a bit strange or disturbing to some of you. Please, know that these things are all part of a larger agenda and my cheese hasn't slid completely off of my cracker. To the contrary, I'm simply attempting to put the cheese back in the center.

Till i speak with you again, be well and Peace be with you, D

A thought before 2012

I haven't penned anything in a while. I know this is not news, but it reminds me of my shortcomings in the management of my journal. It's been just over a month since Thanksgiving and my last entry. I have sat down a couple of times to write something, but each time, i do, i seem to be drawn away to deal with some mundane parental thing. You know, if i weren't here to settle which one of the boys was better at Madden Football or to decide which of the boys has the right to the remote control at any particular moment the sky would fall. Naturally, the one with the right to the remote is the one wanting to watch whichever show is less annoying to me. It's good to be the King!!!

I joke about these things, but any parent will tell you this is the price of having kids. This last month hasn't been completely wasted on my refereeing job. I completed something i have had on my list for about thirty years. I got my Amateur Radio License.

This journey began sometime back in the 1980's. Wait, Wait, Wait... First things first. Everyone, please meet my Aunt and Uncle. Most people sing the praises of their parents and the impact they have on our lives, but my circumstances have always seemed to be broader than that. I have had the great fortune to be raised by a few men, each of whom are uniquely different than the others and a few women who are equally as unique in their own right.

These two are one of only two couples on that short list. My Aunt, Jackie, taught me, if you talk to a child in a voice soft enough to make a child work to listen, the end result will be far more favorable than the one you get by yelling loud enough to blow their hair back. I got that nugget in April of '76 and it has served me well. My Uncle, Rick, well he's just different. It's a good different, but different nonetheless. Those few of you subscribed here that know him know what i'm talking about. He really is a great man and i forgot how much i missed talking with him. Don't get me wrong, I could talk to my Aunt till the cows come home, but I'll write about her another day. Today, Rick is germane due to the nature of this entry.

Way back in the '80's, i did a little work for my Uncle from time to time. Much of this work involved installing mobile radios. One time in particular, i was installing a car stereo or some speakers or something of that nature in this car he had at the time and i broke the windshield. I was mortified. I just knew he was going to kill me. Pardon the dramatics, but i was all of about fifteen or sixteen as best i can remember. Nervously, i went and told him what i had done and i waited for the world to end. He asked me if i did it on purpose and i assured him i did not and that's when my view of the world changed a little. He said, "It happens and that's what insurance is for." If i live to be a hundred, I'll never forget that.

So anyway, back to my post. He has been an Amateur Radio Operator for about a thousand years. I think Marconi invented the damn thing on Friday and on Saturday my Uncle was reading a book, interviewing Marconi, building an antenna, and attending a radio club meeting all at the same time. Most people would claim he's a multi-tasker, but I'm here to tell you he is not. Multi-tasking is flawed thinking in that you can't bounce from project to project and expect to give your very best to all of your projects. He just naturally thinks in multiple channels. You might think of it the same way a drummer can play several drums at the same time, well in his case insert whatever it is he's doing in place of each of those drums. All effort all the time. Yes, I'm a huge fan of my Uncle and you should be too. hahaha At any rate, way back then in the 80's i wanted to become a Ham Radio Operator. I started to do it, but girls got in the way. I mean, my priorities lay elsewhere. Please, pardon the pun.

About two months ago, my youngest asked me if it were difficult to become a Ham Radio Operator and i told him i didn't think it were any more difficult than anything else one might pursue in this life. So, i told him if he wanted to get his license i would too.

To shorten this part of the story a tad, my Uncle sent us the book and we studied it together whenever possible and we went to a study session put on by the Amateur Radio Club here in Amarillo in December. Well, he didn't pass, but i told him not to worry i had thirty years worth of life on him and that he'd get it. So, he continues to study and i couldn't be prouder of him. In the meantime, I'm getting familiar with the radio my Uncle sent to me and even participated in a local radio network this week.

Now to put a totally selfish and somewhat romantic cap on this story. Once my license was granted i purposely stayed off the air until i could make radio contact with my Uncle ensuring he would be my first contact. It just seemed like the right thing to do. I liked the symmetry of it. So, with a little help of the Internet and a radio repeater site i made my first radio contact and it was with my Uncle. Truly a moment to cherish is one in which a plan comes together. Now, for those of you who don't always notice when God drops in to say hello, this next part is for you. While i was talking to Rick on the radio, he told me my Aunt Jackie was also by her radio several miles away and she was my second contact. You see, after all that planning and scheming, i not only satisfied my own personal goal but received the added bonus of talking to my Aunt as well. Truly one of those moments in my life i will cherish forever. I love you both.

To all of my friends and followers, let this be proof to you that you should never stop learning new things. Learning is a lifelong process by which, if you stop reaching, you'll stop achieving.

Learn something new in 2012. In the meantime, my hope is for each of you to have the very best of what you deserve.

Until i post again, Peace be with you, 88 Dave KF5NXY

Dead Bird Walking

I have been told i shouldn't apologize when i don't feel well. Then again since when have i ever taken advice that made sense.

Sorry gang, but i just haven't felt well lately and my writing has suffered. My neck and my feet are engaged in trench warfare and i'm caught in "no man's land".

You know it's funny, as people age and their natural hormone production ebbs, one of the side effects of this is bone loss. The thing is, when you are thirty and you lose natural hormone production, you don't see yourself as being old so you won't have that problem; Or so i thought. So for the last fifteen or so years my body has been leaching away the bones in my neck and feet and some days it just doesn't pay to plan anything requiring physical activity. Typing tends to be physical exertion on those days. Alas, i'll muddle through as i have no plans to stop being who i am any time soon.

I have some housekeeping to address. The Sisters' Quilts (Bra Quilts) are on!!!

For some reason i'm feeling a little more pressure to "get it right" than i normally do. In the long run of things, i'm sure of one thing. It will be as i have made it and it will be from that sliver of ice i call a heart. I'm going to do it. To date, i have received about eighty bras in all shapes and sizes. (Conditions too....LOL) I have a ball park number i am targeting before i even get out the rotary cutter and that is five hundred. I'm not exactly sure what the pattern will be, but i'm leaning toward something simple. Watercolor, scrappy, scales, i'm just not sure, but to get the most coverage out of them, the pieces will be small and small pieces lend themselves to these types.

As for the picture above, i took that on the way to the store a couple weeks ago. My poor phone doesn't do justice to the colors of the leaves. They really were pretty and it was nice seeing all the colors from green to that red before brown color all in one stand of trees.

We had some family in for Thanksgiving. It was nice to see the Brother-in -Law and his Girlie Girl. She makes me laugh. I was blessed with three days of football (pure sarcasm i assure you), but Rocky taught me how to make Menudo. That is one of those things that was on my bucket list of foods i wanted to master. Now i have a much better idea of the process and it won't take me long to have that one notched in my wooden spoon.

As for the Thanksgiving meal i cooked a turkey. Big shock huh... I was sneaky about it this time. Years ago i made a seasoning blend specifically for turkey. Many of you have that recipe and know what i'm talking about. Well this year i got to thinking about how to cook it and something got me to giggling. I know how my rotisserie treats turkey and i know the ingredients in my

seasoning and i knew a bird cooked under those conditions would look disgusting. So i cut the wing tips off and cut the skin at the end of the drum sticks and scraped up the bone an inch or so knowing full well as the skin dried out it would shrink up about that far. Okay, so one of the ingredients in the seasoning is brown sugar. We all know what happens to sugars exposed to high heat for long periods of time. They burn and turn black.

I got a few faces like, holy hell did you have to kill it?? I think one of the boys asked if it would puff smoke when i cut it like the one in Christmas Vacation.

You know i cut it up and placed it in the bowl and that's the last i saw of it. I know someone snacked on some leftovers on Friday, but there wasn't any when i went to make me a sandwich. I know, i ended up putting some leftover pulled pork on the bread i had already fixed.

It may have looked horrifying on the outside, but i knew what was on the inside. Dave 1 everyone else 0

I know for Christmas this year i'm going to get a rib loin and make prime rib. Probably about a ten pound one because that makes excellent sandwiches the next day. Though i do still have eight racks of lamb in the freezer, i think i can wait until Easter for that.

If you love to cook as much as i do then how can you not be festive this time of year.

May all of your dinners be banquets and every dish a master piece and until i write you again;

May Peace be with You, D

In need of a Woman's perspective

In the annoyingly exaggerated words of Paula Deen, "Hey Y'all." As many of you know, i have been sewing for a great many years. One of the things I enjoy building (man term for sewing) are quilts. There is something about the repetitive precision sewing that calms me. It really makes no difference whether i am sewing a scrappy quilt or paper piecing.

I have made quilts out of old Concert T-shirts, Men's Ties, I even made three quilt tops out of a mans entire collection of shirts he wore to make three quilts for his three sons after he passed away. As a point of fact, right now i'm making an "Ass Quilt". It's a scrappy quilt made from denim reclaimed from dead jeans. The colors range from a very pale blue all the way to black. I call it an "Ass Quilt" because everything you make should have a good story to go along with it. So my story for this one is that the quilt is made from the butt section of women's jeans. Okay, so it's a tasteless guy thing. If it makes you feel any better, just imagine the quilt is being made out of Sam Elliot or Sean Connery's jeans. See, now if you had the quilt, you could have your own story. Afterall, isn't that more fun than, it's just made of old jeans??

Okay, let me get to it. For about as long as i've been intimate with women, i've been fixing underwires. You know, those pesky little metal buggers that pop out of one side or the other just as soon as the new gets washed off. Hell i've probably seen more bras than Herminie Cadolle, but less than Heffner. So, here is the thing i need a Woman's Perspective on. I have been kicking this idea around a few years now for a bra quilt. Yes, a bra quilt. No, i'm not kidding. If you know me, you know this is just my kind of project. I have this vision of making a pair of them actually. One made with all Left cups and one all containing Right ones. Given the general two to three piece shape of the American cup, the pattern that would emerge would be something similar to overlapping fish scales. I'd like to make the top out of all sorts of colors and sizes with a big fat Susan G Komen Logo and donate one to them to be auctioned off or whatever they feel like they would like to do with it. The sister quilt, i'd keep and dispose of as i deem appropriate. This IS NOT something i would sell. The very thought makes me ill. My aim is to give something to the people chasing the cure for Breast Cancer and i'll either keep the sister or make a gift of it.

Now, what i need to know is; is this project in bad taste. If not, do i make it out of new bras or gently used ones? If i do go forward with this, is adding the Komen Logo a good idea or should i leave it out?? I have a hundred questions, but since i am a man i need your answers.

Again, let me make it clear. This is not a joke. I am just as serious about this as i was when i made the Prairie dress for the eight year old that wouldn't see nine, and the gown for the size 32 Bride (who looked beautiful btw).

I eagerly await your feedback and please, pass this on to other women so i can get as much feedback as possible.

Until next time, Peace be with you, Dave

Game Rules

Every once in a while, someone or something happens that really gets my ass out of joint. Lately, i haven't felt much like writing mostly because my ass has really been out of joint. Yeah; Sure; i'm frequently cranky or grouchy. Hence, the Truculent for a middle name on FaceBook. Not withstanding that, i try to keep a nice even demeanor and struggle to live as simple a life as i can. I was told many years ago, by the first doctor i liked, to cut as much of the stress out of my life as possible and i've worked very hard to limit the stressors in my world.

Well, here a couple of years ago i started playing a game where the rules were not only undefined, but there seemed to always be a reason why any rules couldn't be established to aid in the structure and advance the game. This one sided approach to game play came to a head recently. It has caused me to reevaluate the game, how it has been played, and my willingness to continue.

So, i grabbed my rosary and my bottle of Esperanto and meditated on the subject. Eventually, i came to a realization. First, when you wash dishes, you have to wash both sides, not just the front. Second, Hawthorne said that all you had to do to be nothing is simply to do nothing. And Third, when i dig my heels in i always win.

What does all this mean?? Well, it's simple enough. My plates are clean, i'll no longer sit by and do nothing, and my heels are dug in good. I'm not playing this game until the rules are defined and the playing field is level. So, when the rules are made and the deck has 52 cards and an even shuffle, deal me in. Until then, i'll stick with my crossword puzzles as i never was a fan of solitaire.

Now that i have gotten this out of the way, i am going to post several in the next couple of weeks and get all the ugly drafts taken care of.

Until i write you again, Peace be with you, D

Ramblin' Bamblin"

Ordinarily, i'd say let's go to the Waffle House and get some breakfast, drink coffee, and talk treason until dawn. This just isn't reasonable because i'm wherever i am and you aren't. You are where you are and most likely asleep. In lieu of that, i figure i'll just sit here and see what bubbles to the surface.

It's about three thirty in the morning and i just got the last glass of ice from the bag in the freezer. Add to that a fresh can of caffeine free Dr Pepper and a BC Powder and many of you can envisage the scene. I'm here at my desk; sipping, puffing, and playing with my moccasins with my toes.

It's been bugging me that i set a goal of twenty-six postings for this year and i'm only at twelve with three quarters of the year gone. I'd like to think that my postings happen organically and are in no way forced. Then again, i'm reminded of the previous posting that was anything but organic. Or wasn't it?? It did indeed occur from those elements that bubbled up while writing it. In some regards though, i would say it was forced. I was feeling the pressure of not meeting my own goals and i had a couple of friends ask me to post something, so maybe it was. I'm not sure and i guess i'll have to leave it as it is.

It's not like i don't have anything i want to write about. I have a list that is only rivaled by my grocery list and Santa's. I've been threatening for months to write one about my Aunt. She is a beautiful lady that has been a parent, a friend, and a great influence on me. While it is a bit scary writing about one of your friends or relatives, it can be very rewarding in a sense of tribute or sharing with the world how wonderful these people are.

It's not just people either. I drive a 1991 Isuzu Trooper. It's a big square chunky refrigerator box of an SUV built before they attempted to make them comfortable. It's ugly, the paint is faded and chipped, the seats are like a wooden chair and the carpet is horrifyingly dirty. (and NO, a steam cleaner won't help) However, for everything it isn't, my Trooper is two or three times over.

Then somewhere in there i'm hoping to find my silliness again. I just haven't been silly in a while and that's starting to bug me too. Hell, i'm probably on the downside of a Bipolar swing or something. I probably shouldn't joke about it as it sounds like self pity, but if you can't smile with the bad, why smile with the good?? I found out last week the celebrated football coach Vince Lombardi was Bipolar. Maybe i should have been a football coach. Hmmmm, nah, the cord on the whistle would mess up my hair too much.

At any rate, there's a meeting of the Married Single Parents Association in a few hours so i should try to pass out.

I certainly hope you are all doing well and that the Autumnal breezes find you soon.

Until i write again, Peace be with you, Dave

Stick a fork in Me: formerly Back by popular demand

Okay, so it's been a while since i sat to write anything. I've even had a stalker or two, casually comment on my absence. I do appreciate the attention and i certainly hope i don't let you down. One thing though, don't forget, you get what you pay for.

I'm not overly gabby these days. It's quite possible that my son's football is taking its toll on me. Then again, my younger son and his FFA is a concern,but not quite as bad. Let me attempt to clear this up a bit. When it comes to football, he's attending two games a week. I thought the UIL had rules about this, but what do i know? I'm just a housewife. Honestly, i don't see how he's going to be out that much and be academically successful. Time will tell, but it's a burden knowing everything. Then the FFA thing. Last year, the cost of a hog was 190USD. Much to my surprise, this year it is right at 400USD. What in the hell. Feed is twice as expensive too which equals something in the order of two hundred bucks a month for feed for a pair of hogs for eight. Sorry Zeke, i guess you are going to concentrate on the political side of the club this year cause the animals are out.

Okay, sorry, had to go meet the teacher. Someday, someone is going to have to tell me just why we do that. It's not like the teachers ever say anything other than i enjoy having BooBoo in my class. Though there was a high point, if you could call it that. I threatened to whack his AP English teacher in the head if she used "Took'n" as his physics teacher had. I have to admit. I use poor English regularly, but i'd never use Took'n in place of " have taken".

Ah hell!!! It has taken me two days and a number of hours to write this. I did manage to make the orange and black table cloths i was asked to make, but other than that i think i'm fried. By the by, those are organizational colors not linens for Halloween.

Ok, that's it. I'm posting this without editing. It is what it is. And for the record, i just found out that Mr Football has fallen behind in his classwork.

You know i love you more than my luggage...

Peace be with you, Dave